I want this type of relationship where not everything is planned out, where putting in effort is enough, where forever isn’t expected, where marriage isn’t promised. Just go with the flow kind of thing, I want that.

I’m tired of it too. They always try to prove to me that they would do anything to show that a relationship is worth it. But it always ends up with them changing their minds. Why bother?

kristytuyetle:

I’m scared that you’re going to leave me. And then I’ll be here, devastated and heart broken all over again. I don’t want to repeat going through that experience.

(via heartpinkroses)

I have having it, I hate dealing with it. I hate having anything to do with trust.

And I’m not speaking about having them completely out of my personal life, but I feel forced to hide everything from them if they never give me any freedom. All these restrictions are really taking a toll on me. It seems that they must doubt the way they raised me if they don’t trust me with anything. I never gave them a reason not to put their faith in me, but now I realized that their reasoning was never rational from the beginning. They’ve always babied me & I’m getting sick of it. Sure, it’s to protect me from the world, but they need to understand that I’m going to have to handle everything on my own eventually. I’m sick of this, I just want my freedom.

Maybe that’s why I can’t like someone for who they are when all I do is magnify the features that I don’t admire.

Thanks calculus hero :”) No how about you help me pass & then I’ll be like woohoo~ 

This mentality of mine has been stuck with me for so long that it’s wearing itself out. I always get to the point where I realized that I’ve just been living in lies, where nothing will change unless I adjust to more lies. There’s nothing to be happy about, there never was.

Not about myself, not about other people. I feel completely numb.

They’re willing to put in all their efforts just to impress you before a relationship. But when you two become a couple, they drop you as if they won in the end of their game. All they want is someone to chase just to boost their pride when they succeed. Why even bother with relationships if they can’t follow through.